Eating meat opens the door to lower consciousness and makes it harder to stay out of the states of fear, anger, jealousy and the remorseful emotions that follow. - Bodhinatha Veylanswami
Buddhism teaches that one of the main ways we suffer deeply is by our attachments. Nowhere is that more clear than in parents of adult child addicts. Dr. Deepak Chopra describes the attachment this way: “In spiritual terms... attachment makes you feel obsessed about your children's lives. It makes their pain feel like yours. You all but lose the boundary between you and them.”
If attachment is the cause of suffering, then detachment is the path out of suffering.
Here are five detachments parents of adult child addicts must make:
1. Detach from the thought you caused the addiction. End any and every sense of self-blame! Don’t buy into the the false view that you were a bad parent, a negligent parent, inattentive, etc. Addiction is the result of choices and actions your adult child makes and continues to make. He/she is solely responsible for the addiction not you as the parent.
2. Detach from the thought that you can cure the addict. This is magical thinking from early parenting years when it was possible to kiss away an injury. If you persist in the belief you can “cure” or “help” the addict you simply become an enabler, a parent who removes the natural consequences to the addict of his or her behavior. All 12 step programs and professional therapists stress the reality that it is only when an addict fully experiences the damaging consequences of his/her behavior that the powerful incentive to change emerges. Getting there is described as “hitting the bottom.”
3. Detach from the thought that you can convert the addict. This is tempting, to be sure. Dragging an adult child to a religious service, meditation group, yoga class, etc., will likely be an exercise in futility. Any conversion will only take place when the addict is ready, willing and takes the first step on his/her own.
4. Detach from the thought that you can control the addict. If your child refuses help, you must learn to accept his/her decision. There is no way you can force health and sobriety upon him/her. The best you can do is make sure your child knows what resources are available to him/her should they decide to help themsleves.
Yes, detachment is hard. It causes fright but it’s right . . . for you . . . for your adult child addict.
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The opposite of love is hate, and the amount of hate that finds expression in every war...warrants the conclusion that war is hate and peace is love. - Ben Salmon
There’s been a great deal of concern regarding Rohinga Mulsims being persecuted and driven out of Myanamar, a predohere’s been a great deal of concern regarding Rohinga Mulsims being persecuted and driven out of Myanamar, a predominately Buddhist country. Those who follow Buddhism in the West wonder how this could happen and why it’s happening. For the most part, all we hear is what Western writers are saying.
Just last week, Renowned Tibetan Buddhism teacher Dzongzar Kyentse Rinpoche has come to the defense of Aung San Suu Kyi over her treatment by the West, which he calls “blatant double standards.” Suu Kyi has had several honors stripped away from her because of the Rohinga issue.
As a Buddhist, Dzongzar Kyentse Rinpoche opposes completely the mistreatment of Rohinga Muslims. In his letter of support to Aung San Suu Kyi, he challenges the West in these ways:
1. The West is unfair and biased. He says that the removal of many of Suu Kyi’s awards - from the cities of Edinburgh, Oxford, Glasgow and Dublin to honorary Canadian citizenship. “Those shocking actions against you reveal a blatant double standard” he writes and notes: “Without doing anything and just eight months into office, President Obama was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize. Yet no one demanded it be taken away after he killed thousands of civilians in Mideast drone strikes and bombings. In fact, de-nuclearizing North Korea will do more for world peace than anything Obama ever did, making Donald Trump and Kim Jong-un far worthier of a Nobel Prize.”
2. The Rohinga issue is the result of British (Western) colonialism. “Nothing I write here denies the suffering of the Rohingya people. But instead of blaming you, will the British at least acknowledge their colonial responsibility for bringing most Rohingyas from Bengal in the 19th and 20th centuries as cheap labour to work the Burmese rice paddies? If the British really care and want to redress the harm they've done to Burma and the Rohingya, they will migrate the Rohingya to the U.K. and give them citizenship instead of letting them languish in refugee camps. And instead of revoking your awards as they've done, Oxford, Sheffield, Newcastle, Edinburgh and Glasgow will resettle the Rohingya there.”
3. Historically the West has not acted humanely nor democratically toward Asians. “We're badgered to feel guilt for the European Holocaust of World War II, while our own holocausts are conveniently forgotten and buried in the dustbin of history. How many westerners mourn the 15 million displaced and million killed in Britain's partition of India, or the five million civilians killed in Korea and Vietnam? Who recalls that the US. dropped two million tons of bombs on Laos between 1964 and 1973. almost equal to all the bombs it dropped on Europe and Asia during all of World War II - making Laos the most heavily bombed country in history relative to population size. And how quickly have we forgotten the genocidal holocausts of the 16'” to 18th centuries that killed an estimated 130 million native Americans - more than 90% of indigenous peoples there. We non-westerners have considerable cause for grievance against those European invaders who now claim moral authority over our lives.”
Read his full statement here:
In India, Railways recently unveiled the new look of the Buddhist Circuit Tourist Train, a deluxe train with mini library, kitchen with state-of-the-art appliances and stylish bathrooms, a release from the ministry said. The train was flagged-off by Chairman Railway Board Ashwani Lohani. It will be travelling through sites associated with Buddhism -- Bodh Gaya, Rajgir (Nalanda), Varanasi (Sarnath), Lumbini, Kushinagar, Sravasti and ending with a tour of Taj Mahal, the release said.
While the Buddhist train tour package operated by the Indian Railway Catering and Tourism Corporation has been running for the past 10 years with conventional coaches, railways felt the need to offer a new train with improved features, it said.
Coaches have undergone a design change as the railways have done away with the side berths in these coaches which have been replaced with single-seater sofa for panoramic view during journey. A mini library and foot massager with sofa has also been provided. Besides passenger coaches, the new train boasts of a full-fledged LHB kitchen car for the first time on the Indian Railways equipped with latest kitchen equipments like hot plates, ice cube making machines, integrated exhaust system, chest freezer, deep freezer, refrigerator for the tourists, it said.
There are two dining cars in the train, aesthetically designed with a seating capacity of 64 each. The two dinning cars of different colour themes have Venetian Blinds Windows for automatic opening and closing of windows blind. Equipments used in five star hotels like hot plate dispenser, microwave oven, coffee machine, bottle chiller, dish wash machine, among others, are provided, the statement said.
The entire train is fitted with CCTV camera for better surveillance and Very Early Smoke Detection Alarm System for the first time for safety and security of the tourists. Overall, the train has unique vinyl wrap promoting Incredible India by depicting all the World Heritage Sites in India, other important sites, wildlife, Indian dance forms, yoga postures and Indian vegetation.
(source: India News Outlets)
God's central demand of human beings is to act ethically. - Rabbi Joseph Telushkin
People who eat organic food are 25% less likely to get cancer than those who do not. That's according to researchers who looked at the diets of 68,000 French adult citizens. They conclude that the reason for lower cancer rates is due to consuming fruits and vegetables which have not been treated with pesticides and insecticides.
Though organic foods cost a little more, it's likely that people can more than make up the cost in reduced medical expenses.
I deeply believe that it is vital to our spiritual practice that we become spiritually disciplined. Without spiritual discipline we are never going to wake up or advance on our journey through this life. But our discipline must be wedded to joy, and we must find pleasure in the myriad wonders that this life offers. - Joan Gattuso
Satguru Bodhinatha Veylanswami, publisher of Hinduism Today magazine, writes about the importance of having and being in the presence of spiritual friends. In fact, he reminds readers that "we are whom we meet. The company we keep affects our attitudes, speech and actions as profoundly as the foods we eat." So, he emphasizes the importance of spending time with people who have (or are seeking) higher consciousness such as in a yoga class or meditation group.
However, he knows that sometimes we are required to spend a great deal of time "with people who are strongly materialistic or even hedonistic." In this case, he strongly recommends strengthening our aura and offers this simple meditation visualization technique which was taught to hm by his guru:
Sit quietly, breathe deeply and mentally get in touch with your pranic body, first by visualizing it and secondly by feeling it. The pranic body of most people extends out from the physical body about one or two inches, depending on the level of vitality. Of course, the pranic body also completely permeates the entire physical body. As you sit quietly, breathing deeply and slowly, become intimately aware of the vitality, the prana, running throughout the physical body. As you breathe in, feel the vitality of your body. Feel the magnetic energy within it. Feel its life. Then, as you breathe out, mentally and through feeling release some of this vitality, this prana, this life force, and send it out into your aura. Keep sending it out on the outbreath to the aura's outer edges all around your body, from your head to your feet. The outer edge of the human aura is about three or four feet away from the physical body. After you have charged your aura with vital prana in this way about nine times (nine breaths), you should begin to feel a magnetic shell being built around the outer edge of your aura. You will feel very secure and content as you sit within your own aura, which is charged with prana from your own pranic body. You are protected from all kinds of psychic influences, seen and unseen."
Do not resist any thought, do not hang on to any thought, do not react emotionally to any thought. This is the proper response to all thoughts that come down the stream of consciousness. - Thomas Keating
Victor M. Parachin ...is a
Vedic educator, yoga instructor, meditation teacher and author of a dozen books. Buy his books at amazon or your local bookstore.